I was stood in the shower (I'm sorry, you didn't need to know that) and I thought "By jove! I should write another blog post, I've not done it an awfully long time!" Shortly before adjusting my monocle and getting out of aforementioned shower, and here we are! I'd thought I hadn't posted in well over a year, completely forgetting all the photos and what not I put up at Christmas time, so that was a nice little thing to come back across, and it means its not QUITE such a mahussive space of time to cover, not that I would have made that much of an attempt to do so anyway, but there we go.
SO. Uhhhmm, I'm sat here a bit blank now. Too many things to say can be as bad as too few at times, I know that much. I'm off to Edinburgh again in the coming weeks! That's something to talk about. Thrilled, is what I am. I've been for 3 years now and I don't think I'll ever get bored. Seldom do you get a chance to see both all of your favourite comedians and some of the most peculiar human beings (and thats being generous) on the planet. No joke. I mean, the bloody celebrity big brother hasn't got a damn thing on the locals that crawl out of the woodwork come fringe festival time.
Edinburgh local
Popular comedian, Julian Clary
I must admit to you all now that the fellow in the above picture is not in fact an Edinburgh local. I have pulled the wool over your eyes, yes I have. I have deceived and lied to you. In fact, he is the next topic of conversation. I should also mention, no, he is not me when I get older, my Dad, or any other relation. I'll wait for you finish laughing.
....
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SO yeah, this bloke is none other than Joseph Stawinoga, not your average crazy old bloke, oh no, this is none other than "that crazy old bloke who lived on a roundabout for thirty years". He was considered an attraction to Wolverhampton and was delivered meals on wheels to his tent on the roundabout everyday. If you ask me, the man had it made. He lived rent free and had a lass deliver him grub everyday, again for nout. HE LIVED AS A KING. But! Here be the real kicker. At the time of Mr. Stawinoga's unfortunate departure from his green round turf, he left a legacy of THOUSANDS OF POUNDS in unclaimed pension money. So his long lost relatives got a tidy sum out of the blue. I guess its kind of like an obscure biological lottery and no one knows how many, if any, tickets they have. I hope I have a few :( Anyway, The council of Wolverhampton are putting up a bronze statue of the bloke and forever shall he stand, continuing to take up space and being covered in shit. Though, admittedly, from now on it'll be pigeon rather than his own.
Anyways, I've slurred on enough for now. We'll see when I do another one, but a certain Mr. Oli Butler reminded me into another, and best of luck to him and anyone else in their results tomorrow! Here's a picture of Mo Farrah running from the Teletubbies.
He's tubbie bye byeing right out of that shit.
OHAND, Have some music. I always give you music. This is no exception. Hopsin is absolutely fantastic, I've not heard anyone rap so true to the state of the world in an absolute age. Give it a listen, if you don't it really is your loss! Yo.
Peace out bitcheses, (And HAI LAUREN :3 )
You want Romeo, you're not worthyYou're cock-thirstyYou're nasty and probably got herpesSometimes the secret to find is to stop searchingTry a new formula, cause your last one's not working
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